Seeing it was a good American afternoon, Jola suggested we take a walk to enjoy the scenery of Missouri City Texas. We had no destination but it was worth the walk – as we held hand going down the stress to the park at the end of the road – with the breeze blowing sweet sounds to our ears.
Seeing it was a grassy park without seats, we stooped to conquer. She looked around to confirm that the area was mosquito free; whilst I did what I know best doing – take
pictures. Pictures sorta freshens the memoir as good music is to the heart. We started by talking about how the week was and eventually transited into relationship talks. She spent half the time uprooting clean grass and weaved them together as I shared my thoughts on some issues especially on relationship.
Jola: You know I can counsel you on relationship
Me: Whatever… how many relationship have you been in
Jola: Oh waow….don’t underestimate me
Me: Lmao…u joker.
As she weaved the grass together whilst I speak, she paused and exclaimed…
Jola: Hmm...Something just dawned on me. I've never actually been on a date. I've gone out with friends on several occasions but nothing serious. You know how you dress up to kill for the night and all...not me.
--- That struck a chord inside me as I knew she had a lot of challenges concerning relationship and she always being there for me, I thought…this could be my way of making her happy.
Me: So what are you doing tomorrow night pumpkin?
Jola: stopppp! I am not going anywhere with you o
Me: What are you doing? [Giving her the serious look]
We went back and forth on whether she was free the next night and trust yours sincerely I won. She agreed to go on a date with me and planned to wear a T shirt and jeans so I’ll know it's just casual as we are really good friends but I objected.
The D Day
As she went to work the next morning, I called to remind her of our date later that evening. She responded unseriosly and I laughed inside of me.
I had never been on a date before, I had never planned a date before, but I wanted to make history, I wanted to make her smile again, I wanted to make her happy, so for me, this wasn’t going to be just casual, it had to be special – the full component of a date.
Suddenly I realised, there are few things in life you can do without help and this wasn’t one of them. There and then I picked up the phone to call her best friend Carmen to ask for some help.
Carmen: Mister Israel…wassup
Me: Am aiight, I have a mission and I need your help.
Carmen: Shoot, anything for you.
Me: Its Jola, she mentioned to me that she’s never been on a date before so I thought it would be a great idea to take her out on a date and I need us to do this together.
Carmen: That’s a great idea, she hasn’t been too happy lately and I’ve been looking for a way to make her smile so this sound like a great idea. Where do we start?
So I listed what I expected her to do. This was going to be a home date so Carmen’s house was going to be the location. I needed her to arrange the house, switch of all the lights and light up the house with candle light instead; I needed an expensive bouquet of roses, a nice dress/gown, very romantic CD’s that would spice up the evening – of which she asked for my favourite and I suggested “Brian Adams and Brian McKnight”.
We discussed the meals and my choice of fruit for starters. I must confess Carmen is a good cook. She makes this fish – a taste of which can make you forget your name.
At exactly 3:33 p.m., I sent her a text message wanting to know if she was looking forward to the night. She affirmed so and we kept texting back and forth. I reminded her to look her best. Naughty lady she was, she said she was planning on dressing casual and I insisted that she wear a dress since I was wearing a tuxedo. I kept texting to make sure she was heeding to my words; one of which was “Flow with the river so you don't get drowned”.
She became very nervous. We agreed that I was going to pick her up at 8 o'clock.
In the meantime, I was liaison with Carmen to ensure that everything was going according to plan. She confirmed she got the Dress and big box of Flowers and wine but couldn’t get Bryan Adams so I settled for Brian McKnight and John Legend (That’s what some guy call me in London – John Legend, for unknown reasons). If only I had known, I probably would have requested for Wande Coal’s kiss your hands but since I wasn’t a secular music person, I only found out about those songs when I visited Nigeria. You know when you’re in Nigeria, you don’t need to buy a cd, when a song is out, the music guy down your street is blasting it, the DJ playing for the party on the next street is blasting it and if you have the privilege of riding an okada – you might be lucky to get one with a music player – blasting the same song. But for the night, Back at One by Brian McKnight was right and perfect.
At about 6pm, I had all my dress at the back of my car as I sped from Missouri City towards Highway 6 where I was attending a midweek service before heading out on my date. As 7.30pm clocked, I excused myself from the service and went into the Pastor’s office to change – off I went.
As I drove down from Bissonett to I kept texting her that I was on my way. Apparently her sis Shola heard about the date and was getting her dressed, making her up and all. Yes her lil bro Africano was waiting earnestly for this “gentleman” that’s making her sister dress up this much. She later told me how Shola moisturized her hair and made sure her entire look was set. She walked her outside the room to take pictures and teased her.
I kept texting her as headed her way, reminding her to ensure she was having the "make-me-faint look."
At exactly 8.12, I pulled over at her door and asked her sister for “My Date”. She blushed and stepped out gracefully. Being the gentleman that I am, I opened the door for her and off we went. We talked and talked; She claimed she didn't bother to ask where we were going because her mind was made up...she was gonna go with the flow.
What kinds of food do you like I asked?
Jola: African...Nigerian to be precise. My favorite food is jollof rice.
I smiled as Carmen already told me which was why she cooked nice mouth-watering jollof rice.
Me: That's exactly what we are going to have. Let me just call the restaurant to make sure everything's set.
I picked up the phone and called Carmen (pretending I was calling a restaurant) –
Me: Hi is that the Manager, yes I called earlier to a suite for my special date. Is the Suite ready, the music and the candles? How about the straw berries.
Carmen: (understanding our secret) Yes sir, your room is ready and you are good to go.
Just then I turned into a familiar neighbourhood to Jola, it was Carmen’s area. I told her I had to pick something up from Carmen before we headed to our destination – really Carmen’s was our destination.
Carmen true to her word kept the keys under her carpet, the dress was already hid behind her 3 seater chair as I requested and the table was set. Carmen was seated in her car across the street with the roses and bottle of wine. The plan was for her to bring in the roses and the wine midway into the date………It’s romantic that way.
As we drove towards’ Carmen’s driveway, I kept reminding Jola that she was beautiful inside and outside. Just then, the car stopped as I hurriedly ran out to open the door for her. She couldn’t stop blushing. I told her I wanted her to come with me as I picked up some stuff from Carmen’s house. As soon as I stooped to pick the house key under the carpet, she screamed – Oh No, Carmen didn’t set me up. No this is not happening. By that time she realised that we were at our destination.
In front of us was a whole house lighted by candlelights, behind us the stars were shining in the sky and I knew – the night was going to be a great night. I walked her up the stairs lighted by candle light.
Me: We've got strawberries, two kinds of grapes to choose from; jollof rice prepared just the way you like it, sweet cake for dessert and wine for later. We've got Brian McKnight's cd, John Legend...which one do you want us to listen to first?
Jola: [dazed] OMG! You did all this for me?
Me: [handing her a card] Open it
Jola: Awww
She opened her mouth to talk but words failed her. I fed her strawberries as we conversed. She asked if it was okay for her to serve us and I said no; reminding her the night was all about her - she needed to know her worth.
I rang Carmen that it was time to bring in the flowers and the wine. In a matter of seconds she was at the door.
Me: Oh I ordered for room service and that’s the waiter
Jola: Ok
Me: Brb …………………………………I excused myself for about a minute and came back Carmen carrying the vase of flowers and the wine. They flowers were freshly picked and beautifully colored. She wanted to jump up and hug me but cautioned herself.
Jola: Carmen set me up
Me: No she did not [smiles]
Jola: You two set me up. I saw Carmen this evening and she did not tell me all this; she didn't even say she knew about the date.
Carmen dropped the flowers and Wine, took pictures for us and went away
Jola: Carmen actually bought me a dress today. I liked it but I didn't wear it today.
Me: You liked it?
Jola: Of course
Then I paused for a second before asking ---
Me: How well do you like the dress she got you?
Jola: I liked it a lot
Me: Let's see how well you'd like the dress I bought you (As I brought the box of dress from behind the chair.
Jola: [gasping for breath] OMG!! Tell me this isn't real...pinch me and snap me back to reality please.
Me: Everything's real. You deserve nothing but the best in life. You're beautiful and you don't even know your worth.
Jola: No one's ever done this for me; I mean this is the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me.
Me: You deserve more. Open the box and tell me what you think of the dress
She embraced the box like her whole life was in it. She smiled like a baby, the camera flashed as she fumbled with the ribbons. She couldn’t stop talking about how beautiful the dress was. She wrapped the dress and placed it in the box while I walked over to the boom box. I asked her to come dance with me. She walked up to me and kept a distance; I placed my hand on her shoulder and we danced to Back @ One by Brian McKnight. Immediately the song ended, she hurried to her seat; I played a movie. I turned to ask if she was ready to eat and she could not even talk. We ate, drank a little wine (non-alcoholic) and watched the movie.
Me: Are you having a good time?
Jola: Are you?
Me: Best time of my life.
Jola: Same here but OMG
Me: What?
Jola: This is too much for me. Who are you again? Is this the Darius I know? I thought 9ja guys were not romantic o and a Pastor for that matter.
Me: I just want to put a smile on your face. You are very special and you must know it. How do you feel right now?
Jola: Beautiful
Me: You are beautiful
Jola: Thank you...excuse me o. I know this feels like Hollywood and all but I gotta bring a little Nollywood in it. I have some tom tom in my purse that I want to have one if that's fine by you. You know we just had fish.
Me: You know you don't need that right now.
Jola: Really? Don't worry; it'll only take a sec. I'll break and chew it very fast. You want some tom tom?
Me: Nooo bush girl
Jola: You can't turn me down. I didn't object when you offered me fruits. You must accept this one o.
We fought playfully and I accepted it. My plan for the night was for us to wine, dine and eventually go out to see the water falls. she told me she'd rather stay indoors and I said it was okay. She placed her head on my shoulders as we watched the movie. A while after, we had dessert, talked and danced again.
As we danced to John Legend’s “Love the Way it should be”, I reminded her that we can always have love and peace, love that gives us hope….…..love the way it should be, she only had to wait for the right person. I prayed for her for God to give her a man that can love her “this way and more”.
My role was just to make her understand that “Life is meant to be full of love, fun and joy”. I wasn’t the Messiah she was waiting for.
We laughed about everything; every second was splendid. At the end of the night, I opened the door, carried her flowers and dress to her front porch. `Sealed the night with a kiss on her wrist - the entire night was refreshingly thrilling.
My name is Dayo Israel and that was my first and only true date so far.
Lesson learnt:
In this season of valentine, you can show love to someone without asking for sex or trying to seek a relationship. Just show them that you care.
End Note: The date occured in August 2010 and 7 months after, I am happy to say that Jola is Happily in Love with a Nigerian-American whom she claims "treats her as the Queen she is"....and she continues to appreciate how the date opened her eyes to the fact that we all have a responsibility to make those who matters to us happy every opportunity we have without expecting anything in recourse.
Jola also published her accounts of the date in 2010 but which I would not like to share on this page as it would expose her identity.
Dayo Israel is an International Speaker, Diplomat and TV Personality. You can book Dayo Israel for your next conference or relationship seminar. He’s a great peak performance coach.
Nigeria’s favourite love Actor Richard Mofe Damijo has this to say:
“Dayo speaks from his richly gifted and blessed mind. He never fails to leave a remarkable impression to his audience. u should hear him, you will be inspired. There are not many of his kind around anymore” – Richard Mofe-Damijo, Nollywood Superstar Nigeria.
07:11
O. George
dayo Israel, love and friendship, valentine season
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07:11
O. George
